Why can’t we do our MIAMs Together?

The Importance of a MIAM and Why you can’t attend them Together?

Mediation Information and Assessment Meetings (MIAMs) are a key first step in the family mediation process. If you and your former partner are considering family mediation to resolve disputes related to children, finances, or other family matters, you may wonder why you cannot attend the MIAM together. While it might seem logical to start the process together, there are significant reasons why separate MIAMs are required and why they are beneficial.

What Is a MIAM?

A MIAM is a meeting with a trained family mediator to assess whether mediation is a suitable method for resolving your dispute. It also provides you with important information about how mediation works, the benefits it offers, and alternative options available if mediation is not appropriate. Attending a MIAM is a legal requirement before making a court application for family disputes, unless specific exemptions apply.

Why are MIAMs held Separately?

The requirement for separate MIAMs is designed to ensure fairness, safety, and a genuine opportunity for both parties to engage in the process willingly. Here’s why individual MIAMs are important:

1. Encouraging Open and Honest Communication

When attending a MIAM alone, you can speak freely about your concerns, expectations, and any fears you may have regarding mediation. If both parties were in the same meeting, one or both might feel uncomfortable expressing their true feelings, particularly if there is a history of conflict or a power imbalance.

2. Assessing Suitability for Mediation

The mediator needs to determine whether mediation is appropriate for your situation. Separate MIAMs allow the mediator to independently assess whether issues like coercion, domestic abuse, or intimidation could affect the mediation process. If any red flags arise, the mediator may decide that mediation is not the best route.

3. Ensuring Voluntary Participation

Mediation must be a voluntary process where both parties feel able to negotiate in good faith. A separate MIAM ensures that neither person feels pressured into mediation. This is particularly important in cases where there is a history of manipulation, or one party feels intimidated by the other.

4. Providing Personalised Advice

Every family dispute is unique. By attending a MIAM separately, you receive tailored advice about your situation, the mediation process, and what to expect. The mediator can address your individual concerns, answer your questions, and explain your options without the influence of the other party.

5. Protecting Safety and Well-being

In cases where there has been domestic abuse, emotional manipulation, or other safeguarding concerns, separate MIAMs allow the mediator to assess risks and determine whether mediation would be safe and productive. If mediation is deemed inappropriate, alternative dispute resolution methods or court proceedings may be recommended instead.

What Happens After the MIAM?

After both parties have attended their MIAMs, the mediator will determine whether mediation is a suitable option. If both parties agree to proceed, joint mediation sessions can be scheduled to work towards an agreement. If mediation is not suitable, the mediator can provide the necessary certification for court proceedings.

Summary

While it may seem more convenient to attend a MIAM together, separate meetings serve an essential purpose. They promote fairness, ensure safety, and allow each party to make informed decisions about mediation without undue pressure. By taking this step individually, you are setting the stage for a more constructive and effective mediation process. Due to these reasons, the Family Mediation Council have stipulated that all MIAMs must now be held separately.